Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Fat illegal filling her toyota at the diesel gas pump

I drive a truck. I drive a big truck. My baby is a Dodge Ram 3500 crew cab diesel and I love her! So we're happily going down the road yesterday and her little gas light comes on and she says to me "ding, ding, ding", which means that she is hungry and wants to be fed. So okay, I pull into a nearby Shell station that I know to have diesel fuel.

As I pull in I notice that there are 6 pumps there total, only 1 of which pumps diesel/gas. All the other 5 are gas pumps. Okay so there is 1 deisel pump that of course can pump diesel from each side. The entire gas station is empty except for two vehichles that happen to be at the "Diesel" pump! Okay, well one of them is a big FORD diesel dually, no problem, he USES diesel. But on the other side of the pump stands this fat mexican cow pumping gas into HER GDF'n TOYOTA!!

Okay, it's like you wanna just scream at the idiot "Hey there FAT COW... there are 5 EMPTY PUMPS available that pump gas!! WTF are you taking up space pumping at the DIESEL PUMP for??!!" But no.... I pull up behind her and patiently wait for her to finish so I can feed my truck.

That fat cow has the gas pump (These tanks carry obviously BOTH gas & diesel) stuck in her crappy little car merrily pumping away. So now she decides that while her gas is pumping she'll take the time to walk away and smoke a frickin cigarette! (Well, at least I do give her credit for having a large enough brain to figure out she shouldn't smoke while pumping gas!) But HELLO IDIOT!! You're measley little tank only holds 12-14 gallons... you don't have time to smoke your stupid cigarette.... why can't you wait until your tank fills up (which will take all of 2 minutes) and THEN go smoke your stupid cancer-stick?? That way I could FILL UP MY TANK???
(makes sense to me!)

So I'm sitting there in my truck watching her walk away from her car with her cancer-stick and lighter. I'm agitated now as I can see the pump has stopped pumping. I lean out my window as she is walking away.... "Uh, hello!! Hey, do you think you can pull your car up before you smoke that thing so I can fill up my tank? I use DIESEL... and that "is" the only available DIESEL pump!"

She turns around and looks at me with the typical "I'm illegal and too stupid, fat and lazy to try and learn your language" look that ALL illegals manage to muster on demand... and she shrugs her shoulders. (Yeah, I know.... "No comprendo ingles...)

Well fortunately for me YO HABLO ESPANOL!!! "Oye gorda.... mueve tu peaso de mierda POR FAVOR!" (Well... I may not know how to 'spell' it but I can damn sure shout it!)

She gives me this startled look and starts to reply something stupid I'm sure, but on seeing me open my truck door she thinks better of it and rushes back to her little crap toyota to move it, lit cigarette still in hand.

As she approaches her car I yell out to her..."Hey Einstein, you still have a LIT cigarette in your hand! Are you trying to blow yourself up or something?" Amazingly she drops the cancer-stick and grinds it out on the asphalt with her foot. I find it truly bizarre how they REFUSE TO SPEAK ENGLISH in an ENGLISH speaking country but they understand fully what you are saying when it is to their benefit!!

She mumbles something under her breath, puts up the pump, gets in her car and starts the engine. As if to "show me", she revs up her motor 3 or 4 times, rolls down the windows and cranks up her radio to FULL BLAST before driving off! Ohhhhh, guess you really showed me!! You stupid lazy illegal cow!

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